You’ve got something important to do. Your schedule is clear, you’ve got everything you need, and today is definitely the day you’re going to get it done.
But first, you’ll just check your emails and WhatsApp. Then you remember there’s a load of laundry you should put in. While you’re doing that, you notice the breakfast dishes are still sitting in the sink. You might as well make yourself another coffee while you’re at it.
Three hours later, the kitchen is spotless, the laundry is done, and you’ve even gone ahead and hoovered, but… you haven’t even started the task you were supposed to do.
You’d rather clean the oven than start the “thing”! You even congratulated yourself because at least you didn’t scroll through social media for hours…been there, done that. But you’re annoyed with yourself. Again. Because you have done everything possible not to do the task at hand.
Everyone procrastinates from time to time. But when you have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), putting things off can easily become a part of everyday life. It’s not necessarily because you don’t care, aren’t motivated or lack discipline. In fact, you might care so much that you spend hours worrying about something you can’t seem to get started on.
So what’s going on?
Why is it so hard to just get started?
One of the difficulties associated with ADHD is something called executive dysfunction.
Executive functions are the mental processes we rely on to get through everyday life. Think of them as building blocks. They help us plan ahead, make decisions, organise our time, remember what we’re supposed to be doing and switch from one activity to another.
They also help us get started.
And that’s where things can become particularly frustrating for someone with ADHD because somehow, there’s a disconnect between making the decision to start (easy!) and actually doing something about it (really hard!).
It’s called “difficulty with task initiation”, and it’s one reason why someone can spend an entire afternoon absorbed in knitting a sweater or painting, yet struggle to make a five-minute phone call they’ve been putting off for weeks.
From the outside, it looks like a choice, but it’s a lot more complicated than that.
What does dopamine have to do with procrastination?
We’ve all heard about dopamine, the so-called feel-good chemical. It’s linked to pleasure, rewards, and those little hits of satisfaction we get from doing something we like.
But dopamine also plays a role in motivation, attention and our ability to anticipate the reward of getting the “thing” done. Current research has found that differences in dopamine signalling and reward processing may contribute to some of the difficulties people with ADHD experience when trying to motivate themselves to start a task.
Think about the difference between doing something you genuinely enjoy and tackling a tedious administrative task. You know the one, it’s on your to-do list, but you never quite get around to it.
One is interesting and rewarding right now, which makes it easier to get started on. The other is boring, possibly complicated, and the benefit of finishing it might not be felt for weeks, making it feel impossible to tackle.
For someone with ADHD, that difference is huge, and it helps explain why being told to try harder or show a little self-discipline isn’t particularly useful advice.
Why does everything get done at the last minute?
There’s a familiar pattern that some people with ADHD will recognise.
You have two weeks to finish something. For the first week, you barely touch it. During the second week, you think about it constantly, feel increasingly anxious and promise yourself you’ll start tomorrow. It’s on your to-do list. And…you’ll move it to tomorrow’s to-do list as well.
Suddenly, it’s the night before the deadline. Cue panic and enter caffeine-fueled late night.
And somehow, you manage to get it done.
Sound familiar?
When a deadline is looming, the urgency can make it easier to focus on something that previously felt impossible to start. The consequences are no longer somewhere in the distant future. They’re on fire, right in front of you.
It’s tempting to conclude that you simply work better under pressure. After all, that’s what got you moving.
But there’s a difference between being able to work under pressure and needing that pressure before you can even get started.
Repeatedly relying on last-minute panic to get things done is stressful, exhausting and leaves very little room for anything unexpected.
Sometimes it’s not the task you’re avoiding
Here’s where procrastination gets even more complicated.
Sometimes we put things off because we don’t want to deal with the feelings that come with doing them.
Maybe you’re worried you’ll make a mistake. Perhaps you don’t know where to begin, you’re afraid of disappointing someone, or you’re already feeling overwhelmed by everything else on your plate. Just the thought of starting gives you anxiety.
You know you’re not lazy or unreliable. In fact, you might work twice as hard to compensate for your difficulties, hide how much you’re struggling, or avoid taking on anything where there’s a chance you might fail.
But it doesn’t matter; you still keep putting it off, making excuses, and finding something else to do. And for a little while, you really do feel better. Except the task hasn’t disappeared. The important phone call, the project to design, the invoices to balance, it’s still there tomorrow, only now you’re running out of time and feeling guilty for doing nothing. You may find yourself thinking, “What have I been doing anyway?”
For someone with ADHD, this can become a particularly difficult cycle. What begins as a problem with getting started can turn into something you dread doing because of all the frustration and anxiety you’ve now come to associate with it.
The more you avoid it, the worse you feel. And the worse you feel, the harder it becomes to do it.
What actually helps with ADHD procrastination?
If you’ve spent years trying to become more organised, more disciplined, or more productive, the thought of another list of things you should be doing might be the last thing you need.
But there are ways to make everyday tasks a little more manageable.
- Start smaller than you think you need to. If you’ve been avoiding writing a report, forget about finishing it for now. Just open the document. Write the heading. Maybe jot down a few ideas. The point is to make getting started feel less daunting.
- Borrow someone else’s structure. Have you ever found it easier to work when someone else is sitting nearby? This is sometimes called body doubling. You don’t even have to be working on the same thing. Having another person present can help you stay focused and accountable.
- Make the boring stuff less boring. Put on some music, change where you’re working or give yourself something enjoyable to look forward to afterwards. A little novelty or an immediate reward can sometimes make a task easier.
- Stop relying on your memory. Write things down. Put reminders somewhere you’ll actually see them. Use your phone’s calendar and alerts. Break complicated tasks into steps you can follow without having to figure everything out each time.
- Ask yourself what you’re avoiding. Is the task genuinely difficult to start, or are you worried about getting it wrong? Are you overwhelmed, anxious or exhausted? Sometimes understanding what’s holding you back is more useful than trying to push through it.
None of these strategies is a magic bullet, and not every approach will work for everyone. That’s part of learning what helps you.
Has procrastination taken over your life?
We all put off the occasional unpleasant task. But ADHD-related procrastination can make even simple tasks feel overwhelming.
If procrastination is affecting your work, relationships, finances or mental health, it’s worth looking more closely at what’s happening.
At The Place Retreats, we recognise how frustrating it can be when procrastination, anxiety and self-criticism become part of everyday life. Taking time to explore these patterns and the emotions behind them can help us better understand ourselves and develop healthier ways of responding to life’s challenges.
You might not be able to change how your beautiful brain works, but you can begin to understand it better and find ways to make life a little easier.
And perhaps, instead of asking yourself why you can’t just get on with the thing, you could start asking what would actually help you get started.