We often focus on and celebrate specific mental health and wellness days. For one day, our social media feeds are filled with reminders to check in on our mental health, reach out to someone who might be struggling and make time for self-care.
The day arrives. It passes.
The posts disappear, the hashtags stop trending, and life carries on. But for millions of people living with anxiety, depression, trauma, burnout and other mental health challenges, nothing changes simply because the focus has moved on to the next cause.
Mental health doesn’t follow a calendar; there’s no schedule. We can’t simply put our struggles aside because an awareness campaign has ended. Recovery certainly didn’t get the memo that one day a year our “challenge” is in the spotlight.
I know this because I’ve spent years learning what it means to look after my own mental health. The days when you don’t know how you’ll make it to the next day, and the not-so-difficult ones when you think you might be on the right path.
You can function while falling apart
I’ve struggled with low-level waves of depression most of my life. When my personal life was going well, I felt fine. But a bad breakup, for example, could send me in a downward spiral. On the outside, most people never had a clue about my inner turmoil. I presented as someone well-dressed, with a professional job, and I could smile on cue. They didn’t know I came home and cried over takeaway nearly every single night. No one knew I thought of myself as worthless.
Growing up with a mother who also suffered from periods of “the blues”, I was never taught any healthy coping mechanisms. It’s baffling for me to look back and realise I honestly thought life was just supposed to be difficult and often quite sad. It took me a long time to seek out therapy, because that was never an option for me as a child, teen or young adult.
Therapy was a lifeline for me. I looked forward to my weekly meetings so I could talk things out and get professional advice. I would recommend therapy to anyone struggling with depression. However, I would manage expectations: talking a few times a month isn’t a quick fix. The challenges that brought on my depression and anxiety weren’t created overnight, and they weren’t going to be solved or fixed quickly.
After a few years, I realised that, alongside therapy, I needed to take personal responsibility and create more ways to support my mental health in everyday life.
Recovery can be a roller coaster
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned about my mental health journey is that recovery isn’t a straight line. In fact, it can sometimes feel like a nonstop roller coaster. There are good days where you’re flying high, and really bad days where you feel like you’re endlessly plummeting downwards. And of course, there are plenty of days somewhere in between when life is just moving along as it should be. Sometimes I felt like I was making enormous progress, only to find myself triggered by something from my past and BAM, just like that, I found myself struggling again with the same thoughts and emotions I thought I’d already dealt with. But no, recovery is a winding path, and healing can take a long time.
For a long time, I saw those triggers and difficult days as major setbacks. I thought I was doing all the right things, so why was I still feeling so sad? Why did I get so overwhelmed and anxious about everyday stresses?
Eventually, after many intense therapy sessions, I finally realised that recovery didn’t necessarily mean all of my negative emotions would be gone and that I’d feel happy all of the time. Life is far too complex to have only one emotion. Being human means experiencing a whole range of emotions, from love and joy to fear, sadness and everything in between. No one is perfectly happy all of the time.
Changing how I approached my mental health meant I had to listen to my body, recognise what I was feeling and try to understand what was behind those emotions and reactions. Only then could I learn how to respond in healthier ways that supported my own wellbeing.
That shift in perspective changed everything. Rather than waiting until I was struggling to do something about my depression or anxiety, I began finding healthy ways to heal with new habits and routines.
This is what looking after my mental health looks like
Long before and well after World Mental Health Day, I continue to focus on what I’ve learned in my recovery journey. Aside from therapy, there are a variety of everyday practices that keep my mental health in check.
For example, I’ve learned the difference between pushing myself to be productive and when I truly need rest. I’ve also come to recognise the importance of sitting with my feelings and processing my emotions rather than keeping “busy” in order to avoid them. I now understand that boundaries aren’t me being selfish or “too much” but rather safeguards for what is best for my health.
My non-negotiables are movement, eating healthy foods, no alcohol, gratitude, meditation and social time.
What does that look like on a day-to-day basis?
It means I make intentional space for the practices that serve my mental and physical health. Starting my day with silent meditation and a gratitude list sets the tone for an intentional day. Movement is a must because I need a way to process my emotions physically. I feel my best when I regularly lift weights, go for a run, take a walk with a friend, do yoga, or spend time in nature moving my body. Eating nutrient-rich, whole foods with little to no sugar, combined with zero alcohol, has helped me to feel powerful and fully in charge of my health as I move forward.
I also try my best to be social every day, whether it’s catching up while working out, having a meal, or just a quick text to let someone know I’m thinking of them, maintaing connections is vital to my mental health.
I didn’t start all of these at once, and I certainly have days where I miss the mark, but I know what makes me feel my best. If I have a day where I’m feeling sad in the afternoon for no reason, I stop and ask myself, “Did you work out this morning? When did you last eat, and what was it? Have you talked to anyone besides the cat today?”
Often, I can identify something I’ve neglected that might be contributing to my low mood and make a few adjustments. Other times, I simply have to accept how I’m feeling and give myself some grace as I get back on track. There’s always a new day. It’s important to note that what works for me won’t work for everyone, and that’s OK.
There’s no single, simple approach to mental health.
For me, understanding that I can feel sad without believing my entire life is falling apart has been key. I can look at my feelings, observe them and move on, knowing that nothing is permanent and this will pass. I’ve also accepted that I won’t feel happy every day. This has also helped my relationships, and I’ve become more compassionate and empathetic when others are having a tough day.
Most importantly, I’ve learned that mental health isn’t something you focus on once a year, make a social media post and then forget about. It’s an ongoing relationship with yourself and your own mental wellbeing.
Taking care of your mental health at The Place Retreats Bali
While my own recovery has taught me the value of daily habits and routines, I’ve also learned how important it is to have access to professional support and dedicated space to focus on our mental health.
Awareness campaigns definitely get people talking, challenge stigmas and encourage those who may be struggling to seek help. But awareness alone isn’t enough.
These conversations need to become part of our everyday lives as we make mental health care more accessible and create workplace environments where people feel safe to speak out about their mental health challenges.
If mental health struggles are affecting your self-esteem, personal life or relationships, The Place Retreats, an award-winning luxury wellness retreat, can provide a safe space and help you explore the experiences and patterns contributing to your difficulties.
Our Balinese tropical sanctuary is designed to help clients focus on themselves through holistic therapies, movement practices, and mindfulness techniques.
Through individualised therapy sessions (including EMDR, CBT, and DBT), Kundalini yoga, meditation, and deep-tissue matrix healing, our expert team offers a personalised approach for every unique individual.
Contact us today to learn how our tailor-made retreats can help you.